Loss

I think I was lucky in a way growing up in that I never experienced any true tragic losses.  Sure, family relatives or people I knew died, but they weren’t close enough to me for it to really bother me other than make me contemplate mortality a little more that day.  I’ve probably experienced more loss in the sense of friendships/relationships, as the result of one of three scenarios.  One is simply diminished or lost relationships/friendships due to moving away or not being in close contact with them on a regular basis.  Two is the loss of overall friendships/relationships due to the dissolution of romantic relationships.  Three, and a very recent occurrence, is the loss of relationships/friendships due to personal growth and change over time.  Since this is going to apparently be a three-part series, I will focus now on the first scenario.  It perhaps bleeds into the third scenario, but I believe there is enough to warrant its own category.  Back in high school, when I used to live in Ohio, my friends and I were very close.  We did things together a lot and hung out  often.  They were my very best friends.  And then graduation happened.  Well, as was the case for most people around where I’m from, the rest of them pretty much stayed in the same area.  I did not.  I could not.  I just knew that I was meant to do big things in life and was not meant to be in the same small town my whole life unlike so many others there.  I feel like someone told me or I read something around that transitional time in my life that said that those strong friendships would likely fade away as life goes on, and people move away from each other.  I choose to deny that.  I believed things would always be the same, when in fact things are never the same.  Things are constantly changing.  As the college years went on, I found myself certainly being around those people less, but also talking to them and thinking about them less.  It is hard to be really good friends to people you aren’t even around, save for a few times a year.  I have been slowly learning, especially lately, that life goes on for all of us.  That old town doesn’t remain stagnant and isn’t waiting for me to come back to resume its life.  Things will not be exactly how I remember them, how they were many years ago now.  Things will never be how they were.  We can only work with the now and go from there.    

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